Something will grow from all you're going through, and it will be you.
Often times our experiences in the present feel absolutely permanent. We get lost in the struggles of emotional stability and object permanence. Imagine this, when we were younger when someone would take our favorite toy away from us we would cry and fuss. This was because we didn't know if it was gone forever. Developmentally we were able to understand that because something isn't seen in the present doesn't mean that it is "gone" or "lost", it's simply not there in the moment. Mom and Dad will return same as our favorite Teddy. We mature through this stage... so we thought.
“Why is it... that when the story ends... we begin to feel all of it?” - The Sun and Her Flowers
When we experience loss; either from an ended relationship, fallen friend, deceased loved one, or change in career, we feel this same terrorizing fear that our lives would never be the same. That we have permanently lost a part of ourselves in the process.
Grieving The Timeline
The biggest thing we let go of is our image of the future, our timeline. We all have some expectation of what our future will hold. We'd be married, with children, a lucrative career, huge family, and financial security.
Naturally, no one says to themselves as a child "I'm going to struggle with finding happy relationships after losing a loved one (best friend, family member, or mentor)". However life has a different plan for us. We experience the losses, grieve the timeline, and become stronger in the process. We learn how to adapt and how to love ourselves in the process.
If you lose someone but find yourself, you won!
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